Ten Steps when Diagnosed with Cancer
You are the patient, no one else! And for everyone else, the best way to help out a friend who has been diagnosed with cancer is to listen – only listen!
I get curbside consults about cancer all the time. I don’t mind one bit! If someone calls me about a specific cancer diagnosis or questions about a particular treatment, our conversation can be very direct and to the point. More often, someone stops me or calls, often a bit overwhelmed, asking my advice about what steps they need to take when they have just been diagnosed with cancer. Here is my Top 10 list of how to handle a new cancer diagnosis:
1. Breathe. We cure nearly 7 out of 10 patients with cancer today, so the overall odds are, you will be fine. Obviously, there are many factors affecting prognosis and treatment.
2. Educate yourself. Cancer is not one disease. There are many different types of cancer and cancer can originate in any area of the body. You need to know where your cancer started, what type of cancer it is, if it has spread, and what stage the cancer is. Most of that information should come from a cancer specialist. However, there are good resources online to help you understand various cancers, especially from the American Cancer Society at cancer.org and the National Cancer Institute at cancer.gov. Stick with those trusted websites. Absolutely avoid random Google searches. There is too much misinformation and harmful information out there.
3. Write down your questions. As you read and research, you will have questions. I always tell patients, there are no stupid questions. But your physician may not know what to tell you if they don’t know what questions you have. Write your questions down and take them to your appointments.
4. Learn your treatment options. Treatment for cancer is patient- and cancer-specific. Treatment may range from surgery to radiation to chemotherapy and/or immunotherapy or a combination of the above. Each of these treatments is given by different specialists. It is likely you will need to see more than one cancer physician, depending on the type of cancer you have and where it is. This is what physicians refer to as multidisciplinary care.You may be called upon to choose between different but equally effective treatment options. Unless you know what those options are and can compare side effects and potential quality of life changes, you cannot make an informed decision.
5. Take someone with you. When you go to your appointments, it is helpful to have a trusted relative or friend with you who can take notes and make sure you have all your questions answered. That way you can focus on what the doctor is telling you.
6. Take others’ advice with a grain of salt. There are many well-meaning people out there who do not know how to keep their mouths shut, to be honest. You know the type – the neighborhood healthcare “expert” whose mission in life is to tell you what you need to do. Ignore them. Despite their insistence, they do not know about you and what you should do. It doesn’t matter how sincere they may be, they have no business getting into your business and telling you what to do. Kindly tell them thank you and move on. On a related note, ignore the religious “expert” who wants to tell you either your cancer happened because of some sin in your life or your cancer will only be cured by prayer. Those people are doubly dangerous. Not only do they not know medicine, they don’t know theology, either. Don’t feel guilty or let them sow that insidious seed of doubt in you about following your doctors’ advice. And for those of you sincere “friends” who think you know what you are talking about because your uncle’s brother-in-law had something like this 20 years ago and this is what happened, please just keep quiet. The best way to help out a friend who has been diagnosed with cancer is to listen – only listen.
7. Take charge of your care. Push your doctors (and their office staff) to get tests scheduled quickly and to move the process forward efficiently. That can mean scheduling multiple tests and consultations at the same time. Too often, I see a patient being sent to one consultant, which can take weeks, then one test being ordered – another week or two – then a referral to another consultant and on down the line. By the time treatment is started, it can be months later.
8. Second opinions are overrated. You may not need a second (or third or fourth) opinion. Because much of cancer care these days is multidisciplinary, you are probably getting the input of several physicians already (often a surgeon, and medical oncologist, and a radiation oncologist). The old concept of a second opinion is now built in to the modern multidisciplinary approach to care. Seeking further opinions may not only unnecessary, it can significantly delay your cancer treatment. As I will discuss next, it can overly complicate your care as well.
9. Let your doctor be your doctor. Sometimes patients want to go to that big cancer center in that big city so they can develop a plan to be done back at home, as if local physicians are simply technicians following a plan someone else developed. It doesn’t work that way. Much of cancer treatment today is well-established with national guidelines (see nccn.org for patient resources) and determined by what insurance companies will pay for based on these and other guidelines. As a result, treatment recommendations are likely to be the same anywhere you go. Which gets to my final point:
10. Local care is often better care. Lufkin is the healthcare hub for a 12-county region. Not only do we have sophisticated cancer treatment here, we do heart surgery, neurosurgery, and robotic surgeries, too. We can be proud of our healthcare facilities and physicians. When you can get the same treatment locally without the hassle and expense of going out of town, why would you?